Solitude vs loneliness

Last year, as an experiment, I chose Playa Negra in Costa Rica to spend my first solo Christmas. At a time when families gather, I aimed to experience a minimalist Noel.

"Better alone under a palm tree than in the cold," I'd tell my loved ones.

Awakening at 5:30 am to the symphony of roaring surf, howler monkeys and tropical birds, I was drawn to the emerging dawn. The air's warmth, akin to a comforting hug from nature, welcomed me.

On that beach, with the sun rising above the trees, I reflected on solitude versus loneliness. My thoughts drifted back to the Swiss Alps, where memories of my father's tragic death in an avalanche weighed heavily.

Falling crystals amplified my loneliness, mirroring the depth of emotions, much like the accumulating snow. Unmet expectations from those around me, and beliefs of how they "should" act, further heightened my sense of rejection.

But here, amidst the tranquility, I was free from triggers and expectations. The clarity was profound: the difference lay in choice and autonomy.

Now, no matter where I am, I affirm my preference for solitude and discover peace within. Of course, it's still easier under a palm tree.